Sonder. (noun) the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk. (The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows)
This is my favorite word. A made-up word mind you (read: The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows) When it comes down to it though, all words are made up. So, this is my favorite word. Not because of the way it sounds, but rather what it means.
It started after high school and pushed me to the introverted state I’m in now. Parties and large gatherings are too much for me because there are too many energies. Each person, in my mind, emits this aura like a fountain. It’s like that scene in monster’s inc when they find out laughing causes way more energy than screams and, for a moment, everything supercharges and blows up. That’s what happens to me, but on the inside.
At first, it crippled me, but now I’ve learned how to wield it positively. What used to be my biggest weakness, is now my greatest strength. I use empathy and sonder as a way to feel powerful moments happening all around me, and with my skill as a photographer, I can then capture moments other people might have missed.
I may not be that super outgoing photographer who, when you meet them, fills you with life. What I am, though, is incredibly calm and in control. I am still likely to be one of the most optimistic people you’ll ever meet, but it’s soft and relaxed. On top of all the overwhelming energy that you will experience on your wedding day, I will be the calm. When you need to take a deep breath and relax for portraits, I will be your lighthouse. I am a peaceful awareness. I was given a gift, that until I learned how to manage it, it was a curse. Now that I do understand it though, I want to use both of my gifts to help couples in love, just like you. Your story is unique, whether you realize it or not. My service to you is not just a stress-free wedding, however, a lifetime of memories that encapsulate the vivid and complex emotions of the all the people you love.